What I'm Learning

It has been awhile my friends, but I have been getting accustomed to my new role as a hospice chaplain.  It is a very unique role, but I am thankful for the opportunities to advance the Gospel.

OK!

Sometimes I just want to be heard.  I don't want suggestions or answers or more questions, I just want to be able to say something and be heard, like really heard and then basically be done with the situation.  You ever feel like that?  I seriously feel so bad for Job who rattles off how he feels in Job 3 and then for the next 34 chapters have to listen to people who are trying to fix him, correct him or "save" him.  Uggh.  He is hurting deeply and he wants to be able to express it...in essence, to lament.  But someone has answers.  Someone wants to be the hero.  Someone wants to be right.  I'm guilty of that way too many times.  You tracking with me?

Well, yesterday as I was reading Psalm 17, I connected with David that lead me to a sweet time of lamenting with the Lord.  Let me give you context to this Psalm.  David has had to be on the run numerous times in his life, the worst being from King Saul.  In fact, up to 8.5 years that David was on the run from Saul who tried to kill him multiple times.  Poor David, could you imagine not having one ounce of peace for 8.5  years?  So, we have in psalm some moments of David crying out to God for protection.  By the way, I shared with a friend yesterday, I am not sure how I could survive without the psalms.  It is like  having a friend who I can talk to who truly understands me and gets my struggles.  Well, that's David for me.  I keep finding my way back to David for companionship.  I am grateful to God for the Book of Psalms.

Now, there were two parts that capture my attention.  The first one, is simple, sweet and short.  David cries out in v. 8 - protect me as the pupil of your eye and hide me under the shadow of your wings.  That just comforts my soul.  Think about it, we would do anything to protect our eyes from ever getting hit by anything.  I love how our eyes can blink in a split second if we sense something coming at them.   If we are working around something that could get in our eyes, we wear eye gear...well, some of us wear eye gear.  So imagine God protecting His eyes.  There is nothing that could ever penetrate the eyes of God and David says, protect me as the pupil of your eye.  Imagine we are the pupil of God's eyes, shew...now that is protection.  And David believed it.  He hides us under the shadow of His wings.  Anytime I hear shadow of wings I can't help but think about the hen that was found after a severe forest fire that was found sitting on top of a nest burnt to a crisp.  And yet, underneath the mother were four protected babies.  If a mother hen would do that for her chicks, where did she get the idea to do something like that?  Maybe from the One who Created her?  Just chew on those two thoughts and not only chew on them, but believe them.  Powerful stuff.

But here is what I am learning!!!  V. 14 - "save me from men, from men of this world whose portion is in this life."  Let's just go with the good possibility that David is reflecting here on King Saul pursuing him, so David cries out  "Lord, save me from King Saul, whose portion is in this life."  Heck (i debated on putting this next line in here), we could even say that King Saul was a "christian" and David is needing protection from a "christian?"  Yep!  So as I started reflecting on v. 14, I began to ask myself the question, what is my portion?  The things of this world - popularity, riches, success, comfort, significance, acceptance or is my portion in His Kingdom?  Someone whose portion is in this life will pursue after someone else to get what they have.  Someone whose portion is in this life will destroy someone else to make themselves feel better.  Someone whose portion is in this life is about building up their kingdom here on earth.  David is calling out to God to protect him from this type of person.  Heck, I even asked myself this question yesterday, am I one who David would be asking God for protection from?

Now, what does it look like to be one whose portion is in God's Kingdom?  I couldn't help but think of two people quickly:

Luke 23:34 - Father, forgive them, because they do not know what they are doing." - Jesus
Acts 7:60 - "Lord, do not hold this sin against them!" - Stephen

Dang it!  I really don't want to go on any further with this blog.  Then of course, throw Paul into the mix and I am done!  Philippians 1:12 - "now I want you to know, brothers and sisters, that what has happened to me (being in prison for preaching the Gospel) has actually advanced the Gospel.  Come on!  Well, if my portion was in His Kingdom, then these last three verses would be my anchors of truth of how to live.  I think truthfully I was reminded that I am not there yet, but I'm also glad that I am willing to get there.  It is my desire to say, "Father, forgive them, because they do not know what they are doing.  Their portion is in this life."  "Lord, I don't know why this all happened, but I do know that their portion is in this life."  Or even deeper, "Lord, I am in this place as discipline because MY portion is in this life."  I want my portion to be you Jesus!  Help me Lord to get there because I believe you know my heart's desire...

I am so thankful for the Psalms.  In fact, I glanced over at Psalm 18 and it is a psalm of deliverance, isn't that great?  I like David.  Putting Psalm 17 and 18 side by side tells me that David was a real person.  I chuckle how I can have a day in which I am so glad to be alive and then the next day cry out to God, what the heck is going on?  Reading the Psalms is like reading my life.  I think that is why God put it in the Scriptures...it is as if God says, "I get you...I understand.  And if you are tired or weary, come to me and I will give you rest."  David was a man after God's own heart because David found his portion in the Lord.  And when David felt threaten, he turned to God.  May you and I find our portion in Jesus.  When we feel threaten, may we turn to God!